Is it Possible to Have High Self-Confidence But Low Self-Esteem?
Many believe that self-esteem and self-confidence are closely associated and that you can not have one without the other. However, that is a misconception.
It is possible to have self-confidence without self-esteem. Confidence is performance-related, and it comes from the outside world. However, self-esteem is associated with self-worth; it comes from within and is based on how you feel about yourself.
Practice can boost self-confidence in any task. Having or pretending to have high self-confidence can sometimes hide someone’s low self-esteem.
In this post, we will explain the difference between self-esteem and self-confidence and provide you with tips for improving both.
Continue reading to learn more!
What Is Self-Esteem?
Having self-esteem means having a sense of self-worth, self-respect, and self-efficacy. It is the intrinsic belief in your value as a human being.
Self Efficacy is your belief in your ability to achieve your goals. It is based on your past and experiences.
In other words, self-efficacy is the belief that “you will.”
Many people try to hustle for their worthiness through people-pleasing behavior.
However, people-pleasing does not work because you can not try to fulfill your self-worth from the outside in; self-worth comes from within you.
Those with high self-esteem have a sense of self-worth and do not need validation from others.
Furthermore, self-esteem means accepting yourself the way you are.
Individuals with childhood trauma, a history of abuse, or other traumatic events in their past usually suffer from low self-worth and low self-esteem.
What are the Signs Of High Self-Esteem?
- Self-acceptance.
- Accepting who you are, just the way you are is a vital sign of having high self-esteem.
- Living your authentic self.
- You do not pretend to be someone else, no matter what.
- You do not need others’ validation to live your life the way you want.
- Not worrying about people’s opinions of you.
- You respect others but do not worry about what they think of you.
- Your opinion of yourself is the most important thing and nobody else’s.
- You have healthy boundaries within yourself.
- You respect your needs and live according to things that are important to you. You practice self-care.
- You can say no to people. You say yes only when you really mean it.
What is self-confidence?
Having confidence is the belief that you have the ability to trust yourself in performing a task, whatever it may be.
When you start doing a job, with practice, you get better at it; you increase your ability to do that job. You become confident in your ability to accomplish the task.
In other words, having confidence is the belief that “ you can.”
Confidence comes from the outside and the ability to do; it is not related to having a sense of self-worth.
Individuals with low-self esteem can be confident in their jobs or performing many tasks.
Having or pretending to have self-confidence can actually hide a sense of low self-worth.
How can you Raise Your Self-Esteem?
Self-esteem is built, not acquired.
According to Nathaniel Branden, psychotherapist and writer and an expert in this field, there are six cornerstones to self-esteem. If you live your life according to these six pillars, you can build your self-esteem.
The six pillars of self-esteem:
1. Living consciously
Means living intentionally and being aware of your life choices and decisions. Many people live most of their lives subconsciously, going through life on auto-pilot, living their lives day after day, and making decisions without being aware of the why.
To have high self-esteem, you must become aware of your decisions and movements throughout life.
To learn more about mindfulness practice, click here.
2. Self-acceptance
Self-acceptance means you accept who you are, the way you are, no matter what.
You accept yourself for the person you are today, not yesterday, and not tomorrow.
Many people never felt loved or accepted growing up, and that takes a toll on their self-esteem.
They feel unlovable because they were judged and criticized by their parents. Having self-esteem means you accept yourself just the way you are.
To learn more about self-love and how you can start loving yourself, click here.
3. Taking responsibility for your actions
High self-esteem means taking responsibility for your actions, whether right or wrong.
4. Self-assertiveness
Individuals with high self-esteem can speak up and voice their opinion without fearing being judged.
They know and trust that their voice matters as much as others and are not afraid to speak their truth.
To learn about setting boundaries, click here.
5. Living your life with purpose
Having self-esteem means you live your life with intention.
You have figured out your purpose in this world and live according to that, and no one else’s opinion can change your mind. You live your authentic self without excuses.
Having a purpose in life makes you excited to wake up in the morning and gives your life meaning.
6. Living with integrity
Finally, living with integrity means you keep the promises you make to yourself.
If you do not fulfill the promises you make to yourself, your brain will start to believe you and will stop trusting you.
Your brain listens to how you speak to yourself, and having integrity with your words when you talk to yourself, will increase your self-esteem.
To learn about self-care and how you can start taking care of yourself, click here.
Takeaway
It is perfectly possible to have high self-confidence but low self-esteem. In fact, many people use their confidence to hide their lack of self-esteem. Confidence is related to performance, and practice can help increase self-confidence in almost any task. However, self-esteem is not related to the outside world; it comes from within and is associated with your sense of self-worth. If you feel your self-esteem is low, we highly recommend reading the book “The Six Pillars of Self-esteem” by Nathaniel Branden. Remember, self-esteem is built, so with hard work and consistency, you can transform your sense of self from within and raise your self-worth. Thank you for reading!
